Wednesday, September 14, 2011

30 Days of Song - Day Two

Day 2: Least Favorite Song

This is always difficult because I try not to think about songs I don't like. I guess the one that I am not a fan of that pops into my head, though, is Butterfly Kisses. It's a sweet and touching song, but it is soooooooooo overused and my dad is obsessed with it and it ends up being sappy and he cries and yeah. It's annoying. It's the song he uses to torture me, and if that day comes when I get to tie the knot it will NOT make it ANYWHERE in my day.

Monday, September 12, 2011

Character Interaction

Donald Duck is #1, now and always.

I've been asked numerous times in the last year or so how I've been able to create some of the character interactions that are in the pictures from my various Disney trips. I don't feel I am an expert of the subject, but with several trips coming up with the Disney Inexperienced I wanted to create a blog that might help when it comes to making sure magic is created. By no means do I think anyone should just follow this as a play by play. Part of the fun of Disney is just letting the magic happen, and by making your own.

First and foremost, invest in the Disney Photopass service. For Walt Disney World there is a dicounted price if you purchase the disk before you travel. Don't purchase it too far in advance, though. I normally purchase it a couple of weeks before our trip so that it does not expire before I can see the photos. Even better, if you decide there aren't enough photos you want you can get a refund. Disneyland does not offer a preorder special - in fact, you can't preorder it at all - but it is considerably cheaper to purchase (presumably because there are two parks, not four + 2 water parks). This is helpful because you can have the photopass photographers take as many photos as you'd like and you can look at them online - ALL FOR FREE - before deciding to purchase and you aren't the one holding the camera! You can also have them take a few for you on your own camera, but note that some photopass photogs are just as amatuer as the people they are taking pics for and may not take the best photos with your camera. For more information and tips on photopass I recommend the Stitch Kingdom guide.

Once you've figured out the Photopass system - use it. It's so much easier to interact and capture the moments when you're in the moment and the photopass guys are there to make it happen, but don't be disappointed if you don't see a photorapher with the character you are meeting. Each character has a "friend" or "handler" who deals with the organization of the lines and will be more than willing to snap a photo or two. If you are like me and have a DSLR camera - make sure to have it in full point and shoot mode, and have the camera zoomed out as much as possible - trust me, most Cast Members really don't know much about cameras and feel overwhelmed when they look at my rig. Always make sure to ask for them to take multiple photos and to feel free to snap the interactions as well as the posed cheesey smile. Photopass photographers are supposed to already know to do this, but it never hurts to give them permission to do so.
It's ALWAYS Erin's fault!
Before heading to the parks - familiarize yourself with the characters that you're most likely to see. Knowing some of the characters cartoons/stories/personality traits really helps with the interraction. For example: Chip and Dale are friends & "roomies" and were first introduced as annoyances for both Donald Duck and Pluto. One of the most famous cartoons is "Pluto's Christmas Tree" where Chip and Dale live in the tree that Pluto and Mickey choose to chop down to decorate for Christmas. Subsequently the chipmunks create havoc in the tree and tease Pluto ultimately resulting in the tree and decor being destroyed and Mickey Mouse to freak out and call Pluto a bad dog (and dumb mutt). For the picture above, we started out talking to our "favorites". I prefer Chip - who is the brains, and Erin prefers Dale (the goofball). Christmas was already going on in Disney's parks, so I quickly turned the conversation to Christmas Trees and I asked Chip if he was getting along this year with Pluto. He mimed (the classic fur characters do not speak, though the technology may start changing soon with that - at least for Mickey Mouse) that he promised that he was. So I brought up the fact that it wasn't very nice that they played such a mean trick on Pluto (he laughed at that) and I said he should try to be nicer. Chip then pointed at Dale suggesting that DALE was to blame, and that Chip was innocent (he mimed a halo), Dale then pointed at ME suggesting *I* was the trouble maker and then I said "no, I'm the good one, Erin is naughty" so then we all pointed at Erin and the photo is made.

Familiarizing yourself with the Characters also helps the children recognize them in the parks which may help with the anxiety of meeting them. Some children have no problems going up to the characters right off the bat. Others are super shy or even terrified of them. It should be up to the child, and not the adult, to decide if the child will meet any of the characters. Some things that help are if the child sees some of the adults in the group getting silly and having fun with the characters. One of the best places for this comfortable spontaneous interaction is through a character meal. The characters each visit the tables at least once, and if you spend enough time and it's not too crowded (go at an off time during the day, or during the off season) you can get them to return to your table several times. The shy members of your group will have a better chance of seeing the characters up close and at their leisure. We used this method and got great results with my neice in Feb. This is a great way to start your trip as it gets the kiddos ready to meet the characters while touring the parks, and it's overall less overwhelming.

Haille scratches Pluto's nose. That's Disney Magic.
This is where you can teach the kids how to interact and have conversation with the non speaking characters. For example: The easiest is probably Pluto. How would you treat your family pet? Scratch his ears or his nose and watch for a reaction. Chances are you will have a very happy puppy and kiddo. This was the trick that broke the ice for my neice and she spent the rest of the night dancing with Goofy, playing tricks on the rest of us with Dale and chatting about shoes with Minnie Mouse. Who knew she'd come out of her shell just because she scratched Pluto's ears?! The meals are expensive, but you're getting an interactive experience and the memories really do become priceless. It's one of the vivid memories Haille has (the only other one is the Snake on the Indiana Jones ride, and that's not a positive memory for her). Try to get in at least one Character meal with your child(ren) and put it towards the front of your trip. I assure you it will help you judge how the rest of the trip will go. (Also, encourage your child to tell Pluto that s/he's going to scratch his ears so that the character is prepared to interact. They may not see your little one and therefore will not know it's happening.)

The final big tip I can give is - research and figure out who, when and where the characters will be out. If you're like I am, you'll plan your day around rides and characters. Be flexible, most characters come out several times a day. If you can't make one meet up, or the line is too long, try again a little later. Ask a cast member if any special "non scheduled" characters will be out and about. This is normally how princes, secondary characters, and villians are found. If a character is getting set to take a break - don't leave the line. Minnie only needs about five minutes to check on her apple pie that she has baking in the back. Some people in line will leave when she does, so your wait time will be less if you just stick it out. So be paitent and know when and where to be. And don't feel bad meeting the same characters more than once. Each interaction will most likely be different and so much fun!

The main ingredient to a positive and magical interaction is you. The Characters feed off of what you bring to the meeting. If you're all business you'll most likely only get the standard picture. If you don't seem willing to play games, they won't push the issue for fear of offending or wasting your time. If you're just into collecting character pictures, then please move right along, but if you're into the fun photos and memories that last far longer than your trip then take a risk, look a little silly and have fun! Happy snapping!

Want more tips/tricks/ideas? Let me know in a comment or email! I'd be happy to point you towards the magic.

ETA: Thank you to Jennifer F. for correcting some misinformation on the chipmunks. See, I still need to learn things too!

Sunday, September 11, 2011

Where Were You?

Just as every other American, today I have my eyes and thoughts turned to the East Coast where ten years ago four commuter planes were overcome by Middle Eastern Terrorist monsters and flown into the World Trade Center towers, Pentagon and a field in Pennsylvania. The north and south towers in New York City were attacked first, followed closely by the third into the Pentagon. When the first plane hit confusion and misunderstanding began. It had to be an accident, but when Flight 175 flew into the second tower everyone was accutely aware that this was no accident. Flight 93, the fourth and final hijacked plane, had passengers aware of what was going on in NYC and D.C. and they decided to take action. Men and women who were on their way to San Francisco on a normal business day suddenly became the picture of Modern American Heroism.

All of this happened while most of us in Alaska and the rest of the West Coast was sleeping. Alaskans woke up to news of Terrorism - not accident - and towers falling.

I remember dreaming of people screaming that morning. I listen to the TV, Radio or (now) iPod while sleeping to drown out street noises that keep me from sleeping (it doesn't always work). In 2001 I was listening to Moody Radio and they were broadcasting the events as they happened just like all other media outlets. My subconcious fed off of what I was apparently hearing, but I had no idea what was going on. It was a radio program, surely this was not real. Then a loud booming came from my bedroom door. "Dad! I still have half an hour to sleep!" and then a gruff, almost frustrated voice answered with "America's under attack. Get up."

How the heck was I supposed to understand or even imagine what would greet my eyes from the television when I walked into the living room? The towers were on fire - back in 2001 I didn't even know there WAS a World Trade Center. I couldn't have pointed them out of any picture and identify them in teh skyline. The only buildings in NYC that I knew were the Statue of Liberty and the Empire State Building. I know the Twin Towers now. We watched as reports came in and new amatuer footage was shared. And all the while I remember thinking that life would forever be different.

School was still going to be in session. So off we headed to KCHS. I had two classes: Band and Math. While every other student was in the gym and library, the band class stayed in session. Every door was open and as we walked into the classroom every music stand was already in place and music was out. We were going to play the songs of America. Without practice, without warning... without much warm up. It was Deb Sounart's way of showing support, strength and resolve. Some of us were unable to continue to play, and made their way into an office or instrument room to grieve. Fear, saddness all overwhelmed each of us differently.

Second period had us all filing into the next class. And then it was decided that the rest of the day would be spent in one of the big rooms watching CNN. We watched the towers fall. We watched as people jumped from the buildings, ran out with blood and burns all over...

Ten years later those images and memories are still vivid. Yes, we were far away from the destruction and chaos, but the patriotic feelings that followed, and the determination was real and strong.

I just finished watching the tribute on NBC. A part of me wishes it were the full day that would be a final tribute, and yet, that we move on with football and other American traditions I can't help but think this is just another victory over the Terrorism. They wanted to stop us, make us fearful, break our knees. They may have gravely injured our hearts, but that just strengthens us as a nation and people. For my generation 9-11 is like Pearl Harbor for my grandfather's generation. It's not just a day that lives in infamy. It's not just a day that will be forever remembered by those who lived it. It's also a day that marks America's wake up call. That we're not immune to the World. That we're not above the other countries somehow protected by this invisible shield. It's when we let our guard down that our enemies show themselves. We're not smarter, or any such nonsense. We are our own worst enemy. We lull ourselves into this false sense of security. We're already seeing it again... and it's been only ten years. How soon we truly do forget the lessons supposedly learned.

Sunday, September 4, 2011

30 Days of Song: Day One

Day 1: Favorite Song

This is always difficult because I love so many. One of my favorite artists of the day, though is Brad Paisley. And I'm in a pep band kind of mood (hello! football season!) and so what better song to choose as a favorite for this time of year than Brad Paisley's "Online". It's pretty much the story of my life, except I don't even have chats with guys online! LOL

30 Days of Song: Take 2

Last time I only got to day three before life took over and I forgot all about this Blog prompt. So I'm going to try again.

day 01 - your favorite song
day 02 - your least favorite song
day 03 - a song that makes you happy
day 04 - a song that makes you sad
day 05 - a song that reminds you of someone
day 06 - a song that reminds of you of somewhere
day 07 - a song that reminds you of a certain event
day 08 - a song that you know all the words to
day 09 - a song that you can dance to
day 10 - a song that makes you fall asleep
day 11 - a song from your favorite band
day 12 - a song from a band you hate
day 13 - a song that is a guilty pleasure
day 14 - a song that no one would expect you to love
day 15 - a song that describes you
day 16 - a song that you used to love but now hate
day 17 - a song that you hear often on the radio
day 18 - a song that you wish you heard on the radio
day 19 - a song from your favorite album
day 20 - a song that you listen to when you’re angry
day 21 - a song that you listen to when you’re happy
day 22 - a song that you listen to when you’re sad
day 23 - a song that you want to play at your wedding
day 24 - a song that you want to play at your funeral
day 25 - a song that makes you laugh
day 26 - a song that you can play on an instrument
day 27 - a song that you wish you could play
day 28 - a song that makes you feel guilty
day 29 - a song from your childhood
day 30 - your favorite song at this time last year

Where did August go?

Sadly I have been very bad at blogging. It's a number of things that keeps me from it. First and foremost? I just don't know that it's worth it to blog anymore. Everyone is so busy with social network sites and real life that a non-established blogger just can't seem to get a word in. That and I'm so boring that who would really want to read anything I write?

Secondly, work has kept me busy. However, that's about to change. I put in my two weeks notice in and my final day is Saturday the 10th of September. I'm not sad about it. Sure the money coming in would be nice, but the fit was soooooo not right and there were coworkers that let me know it daily. I wasn't meeting the sales goals, and considering a major road block is that I don't like the idea of debt it just seemed pointless to continue to bust my butt for something I didn't enjoy or agree with. There are no jobs on the horizon so I'm hoping that something comes along or that my photography somehow just takes off. If not I'll live with my parents for the rest of my life (or, rather, their lives).

Thirdly, and most fun, I've been busy scrapbooking. I am nearly finished with my 2009 (yes you read that right) Disney World scrapbook. I don't even want to think how many pages it will be when it's all done, but considering the largest book at Passporter.com that I've seen in 90 pages, I have that beat by at least three times over. Insanity! The end of one is in sight, and then I have two more Disney travel scrapbooks to do before I go on vacay again next year.

Speaking of which, the dorktwin adventure has tripled in size! It's still going to be around 8 days long, but  now Jessi from high school and her kiddos (and hopefully one more of her peeps!) are coming with us to Disneyland next August! So excited. She is so much fun, and it'll be a first (I think?) for all of them! She is so excited about the trip, I just wish August would get here quickly!

So that's what I'm doing. I'm also anxiously counting down the days until the next What's In The Bible DVD comes out! Should be later this month!

Sunday, July 31, 2011

Last day of July...

Summer has gone by far too quickly. Tomorrow is august. I haven't been blogging, I've been scrapping. Basically I work and come home and scrap. Mainly because I just need to destress and these days the internet is anything but relaxing for me. That doesn't mean I haven't been tweeting or facebooking, but I've been mainly on my phone.

At the very beginning of the month I let my landlord know, via my parents since the property manager's son was becoming increasingly more difficult to deal with, that I would not be renewing my lease. I was tired of my neighbor's issues. My neighbor in the single unit was becoming more and more stalkerish. She knew too much about me (like where I worked, what my schedule was, and - get this - how much I reportedly made! Who gave her THAT info?). I was still unable to use the laundry facilities because of her smoking, my whole house smelled like it, and I was just done. My landlord was SHOCKED and "saddened" that I wasn't staying.

She had the prop. manager take down the for sale sign, and put up a for rent sign. Then my nosy smokey neighbor invited random people to come into my house. She waited for me to come home and demanded I let them go in. I told her no, she pressured and I finally relented for no other reason than to get her to leave me alone. SHE INVITED HERSELF INTO MY HOUSE! UGH! It makes me wonder how many times she went in there when the prop manager's son was showing teh house to potential buyers because she knew where everything was in my house. Insanity!

So, instead of renting I'm living with my parents in teh house I grew up in while I save money and build credit so that I can get myself a mortgage. It should take about six months barring any random issues. I have my very own credit card (pretty much against my will) which I will use to get my credit score to actually exist (they didn't even have my name in the system when they pulled my credit report. Go me!).

Still working at teh credit union, but as of this afternoon I've completed a letter/application for a job opening at the Alaska Court System here in Kenai. It's a better pay rate, I like the hours they have, and I just don't really feel like the CU is the right fit for me. I've been very discouraged lately, and just feel I need the change.

Photography has once again stalled due to my work schedule. I do have some things planned for August, though, and more in the works. Looking forward to it.

I finally got to go fishing last wednesday. Kept one red and landed four. It was a great day on the Kenai with just my dad. It was worth waking up at four in the morning on my one day off ha ha.

So that's basically the latest on me. Nothing overly exciting, but I had to put something on here for July. I guess.

Monday, June 27, 2011

Jeff King returns to the Iditarod

4time Iditarod Champion Jeff King (2010)
It didn't take the four time champion to realize he's not done yet. King was one of the first in line Saturday morning to sign up for the 40th Iditarod Race. This is huge news for fans and officials alike. Coming up on a major milestone (fourty years of Iditarod) with some of the biggest name in the sports history lined up for the prize, and along comes the reportedly retired musher to try to nab another title.

King retired after a third place finish in the 2010 race. He had been very vocal prior to the start of the race that it would be his last. He was one of the old dogs, he wanted a break. If you were able to follow the musher on facebook you know he did just that, with trips all over North America as well as Norway to witness a historic sled dog race over there. Followers were bombarded with his political endeavors (let's just say he's not a fan of Palin or any of her picks for any political seat), and were wooed by Jeff's pics of his rescued pig. (Yes, that's right, Wilma the pig.)

The buzz of a return started earlier this year after Jeff returned from Norway and his posts about the race over there. He denied his desire to return. Then late last week Jeff asked for information on the Volunteer picnic - which is also the first day of sign ups. Immediately he was flooded with posts asking if he was returning. He coyly did not directly answer, but his posts leaned more to suggesting he was just in it for the food, not the race.

Then, at the picnic an announcement was made. Jeff King was one of the 47 mushers who signed up that day to put their bid in for the 2012 Champion. He will join the likes of Mitch and Dallas Seavey, Martin Buser, Lance Mackey, Jim Lanier, Paul Gebhardt, Hugh Neff, John Baker, and DeeDee Jonrowe. All capable in their own rights, all vying for the ultimate prize.

Also returning after hiatus: Rookie Pat Moon who ran the race two years ago but was forced to scratch after his accident along the Dal Zel Gorge in which he was rescued by another musher, and Aaron Burmeister  who retired so that he could be on the inside of Iditarod Trail Committee (ITC) decisions. Team Norway will also be represented this year with Sigrid Ekran. With the price of travel, and the entry fee for the race, going sky high Team Norway had announced last year that they would most likely not make the trip to Alaska again, but it looks like with the entry fee's being lower this year, and the purse higher, at least one of the team will try their luck again.

Mushers have until sometime in December to sign up for the Last Great Race on Earth. Volunteers will begin signing up for the race around that time. Iditarod 40 has already generated a lot of buzz - a lot of it focussed right now on King and the rivalry he and Mackey share - and it looks like it'll be a race to remember.

Sunday, June 26, 2011

Iditarod 2011 BBQ

Every year the Iditarod puts on a feast for their volunteers, and they hold it the last Saturday in June. This ties in with their first meeting of the minds for the next year's race, and the mushers are on hand to sign up. But, even with all of the excitement of the future, the main focus is to celebrate the people who are helping NOW.

I had never attended previous BBQs, something either always came up - or I wasn't aware of it - and so I made it a point not to miss out on it this year (I flaked last year at the last minute because the weather looked icky). I got up super early because the BBQ is in Wasilla (yeah, you know, it's pretty well  known thanks to a certain former Governor of ours) and being in Soldotna I was about 3.5 hours away. My vehicle has issues right now so I had mom take it the night before to have dad check it out. He was unable to due to some technical difficulties, so I drove my mom's car back to their house, dropped my dog off, took my iffy exploder and headed out (parents live in Kenai so it's 4 hours to Wasilla).

The trip was uneventful - aside from rain and my running out of windshield wiper fluid - nothing really happened to warrant a whole lot of time on it. I was running later than I wanted to be, but still made it to Wasilla well before picnic time.

Holding little "Tusty".
I planned on meeting up and snatching Haille to come with. I figured she'd enjoy the games and puppies I knew would be there. The puppies were the saving grace, she never did go play the games, as she was in love with the seven week old and two week old pups that were out there for HQ guests and BBQers alike. I think if she could take them all home, she would! She was in love with getting to hold them and play with them. She asked questions of the musher and handlers that were there, and at one point Jeff King went over to look at the pups and she talked to him too! How crazy is that?! Little miss shy thing!



My first goal was to find my wonderful friend, Lilian. I met her two years ago volunteering at the Iditarod gift shop table there at the Millennium hotel (which is the official headquarters during the race). She comes every year from Switzerland and is a big favorite of all of us. And not just because she brings us swiss chocolate! Ha ha! She normally doesn't make it over here in teh summer (she takes her vacation around the Iditarod every year! She is my hero!) but she made the exception this year and I'm so glad she did! Haille really liked her, and took a ton of photos of her with my $3000 camera ha ha! She got a couple of good ones of the two of us!

Still have NO idea what we were going for here! LOL

Even though the weather threatened rain, the day was pretty much perfect. A lot of mushers were on hand to sign up for the race (so far the roster is at 47), and some old favorites also came to talk shop (it also helps that they are on the Trail Committee so they were on hand for a meeting before the picnic). Team Seavey was out in full force with Dan, Mitch and Dallas all there. Dallas and Mitch are both in next year's line up. Mitch is still sporting a brace of some sort on his finger (which he sliced off in Ophir causing the Race Marshal to scratch the musher from the race and send him back to Anchorage for surgery. Mitch was back on the trail as a special Iditarod Insider commentator that same week.). Mitch spent a lot of time talking with 2011 Champion John Baker and they seemed to be having a great time talking about what ever it was that they were talking about!


Lance Mackey was "late" to the party, but he strolled right up without much notice from the crowd and signed his name. He'll once again be after #5, trying to tie Rick Swenson (who was absent from the picnic and - so far - the roster!) for most wins. It wasn't long before people realized the head of "Last Chance Kennel" was on the green and soon they flocked to where he stood.

If you read my blog at all you know I'm not a big follower of Mackey's kennel. I prefer others to his style. However, friends of mine from MO were huge fans. They lived in Joplin, MO, and lost their lives in the huge tornado last month. It still seems unreal that Lorie and Glenn will not be around to chat about the Iditarod next year. Lorie was looking forward to see my pictures of the BBQ and had dared me to take a picture with Lance if I got the opportunity. I just laughed at the time. But, when I went into the line with my friend Lilian so she could get her pic with him, I figured I should honor their memory. One thing I have always said about Lance is that he knows how to treat the fans/volunteers.

Me, Lance, Lilian. This is for you, Lorie!
I also had to fan girl over Hugh Neff. He's just such a great personality on the trail, and I love his overall look. He's pretty much fantastic when it comes to dog care and racing in general too, so that's always a plus! Ha ha! I went over and got my picture. He tried to put me at ease by asking if I was a musher and he laughed at my "WHAT?! no." reaction. Ha ha, Hugh. You're *so* funny. goober. I think I just have a "mushers please make fun of me" sign somewhere on me. But the pic came out great, I love it, totally going in my next collage frame!

*FANGIRL SQUEE!*
The last mission of the day was getting our picture with Jeff King. That's right Mr. "I'm Retired" was there. He had most of us buzzing wondering why he was there. He'd posted about the BBQ on his facebook earlier in teh week and when fans asked if he was coming back he pretty much denied it. Well, he lied online because he announced at the end of the BBQ that he was - in fact - on the roster for Iditarod 40. This is a huge boost for so many reasons. Jeff was a face of the Iditarod during the same time as Susan Butcher (he really came into his own as she was on her way out of the sport, but his name was on everyone's lips before then). He's considered the winningest musher. He's a huge celebrity type in Alaska/the sport. And, he pushes Lance to excell. Who knows what will happen now. It's a huge roster already, all the main players (save for, as I said earlier, Rick Swenson) have thrown their name in the pool.

We waited quite a while while Jeff talked with Jim Lanier (another fabulous musher, I was totally geeking out by the end of the day), and Dallas Seavey finally figured out what it was we were waiting for (it wasn't hard Haille was wanting to go home and made a bit of a scene) so he interrupted Jeff and he hopped over to mug for the cameras. Then we were stuck trying to find someone to take the picture. We finally had no choice but to allow Dallas handle the repsponsibility. He lit up when I handed him mine and immediately tried to freak me out by pretending to drop it. Bubba would have been in a world of hurt. Told him that was a 3000 dollar camera. That made him even more of a pain. Why do I like this guy again? LOL Cuz his kid is cute, that's why! LOL

Thanks, I guess, Dallas! (Me, Jeff!!!, Lilian)
Overall it was a fantastic day and I'm glad I made the trip up and back in one day! (8 hours round trip! Long day, well worth it!)

To see all the pics from yesterday go here - http://www.facebook.com/media/set/?set=a.10150282512010664.374461.733500663&l=b1d33efa08

Cannot wait for March!

Tuesday, June 21, 2011

I've got the blahs...

I don't know if it's work - which is a job, not a passion... yet again - or the living situation drama, or the hermit lifestyle I've led these last six years or so... but I just have been in this set pattern of blahs. Aside from vacations to Disney... and the Iditarod... I really haven't had much to look forward to or get excited about. It's frustrating, but at the same time I'm just not enthusiastic about changing the situation either. It could be laziness, or maybe I just don't give a real care to change. I look around me and all of these people are so much better at what we do, have these amazing families - which yes I know have their own trials, tribulations and moments of discontentedness - and I can't help but feel like I'm still stuck where I was in 2003, the only difference is back then I had a whole world of possibilities... now, nothing. I'm in that rut, I've gone back to the one place I promised myself I wouldn't go. And I'm just. UGH!

I don't understand why I am this way. I don't understand why I can't take the bull by the horns. Why I can't seem to even make a sale in my job or with photography! I just feel very inept. I have Two Years before I'm old enough to attend a high school reunion but what will I have to show for it? I'll be the loser on the corner. And not even a good kind of loser.


So, yeah, I have the blahs. And I'm tired of people saying "look on the bright side" quoting a Bible verse or saying "it'll get better" and then tell me their lifestory. Because, honestly, I don't care. I don't want a comforting word. I don't want a "pick me up." I just want to vent, and when I vent I don't want someone to answer back. I just want to scream and hear the lonely echo. So let me do that.

and, yes, this was taken right outside my door. Gonna miss this sight.
And so this post isn't a total loss, let me add a photo.